Juggling fears

Today I gave myself the opportunity to feel like a child again: to open myself to an almost forgotten experience and feel the joy and enthusiasm of trying other things, to live them again. To risk making a mistake and falling down. What was it? Nothing fancy, something very simple. And maybe that's why I still smile when I remember it.

The plan was to do it before lunch at Stanley Park, and so to take the opportunity to know it, as it is one of this city's icons. I went over there then, convinced to enjoy a sightseeing day. Upon arrival it was time to eat, so I went to Denman Street, which has a good variety of restaurants.

After walking several blocks I decided for Vietnamese cuisine, some oriental rolls and a kind of mini-pancakes. I see that I have improved my skills with chopsticks, because I could even eat the noodles (mostly). I had nothing to read -the day had threatened to rain and I did not wanted to carry anything-, so the Globe and Mail, a local newspaper, helped to get me entertained.

Now back to the challenge. I walked into the rental shop (there are several shops a couple of blocks from the park entrance) and then checked out the details (cost, requirements, models), chose the model, paid, got my helmet and went out. I was going to ride a bike!

The first thing I remembered was that I never liked having the seat too high (because I am short, of course. I feel like I'm falling!) So I told the guy "Not too tall, please." So after asking how to switch gears (I rented a 7-gear Cruiser) and after the guy telling me what was the best route to get closer to the park (you can't ride the bike until near the entrance), I started to walk.

Although after just a block I could jump on the bike, I felt a little shy to do it so I moved to a more "private" spot to perform the juggling act. I can't say otherwise, because just as hopping up I started to feel more awkward than I've felt in a very long time. My body swayed from side to side and while trying to maintain balance, I tried to pedal and keep a more or less stable direction. For a moment I thought "...and where are the training wheels of this thing?!" while I got used to something that I had not done since about 15 or 20 years at least...

So there was I, with a big smile on my face, remembering how I learned to ride a bike with my cousin Jorge back in Mixco, in that red Californian style bike, as I recall; with the illusion to achieve this little though important childhood accomplishment. I toured the park (in a counter-clockwise way) on the properly marked path that separates cyclists and skaters from pedestrians. Had the opportunity to take several photos and to do some exercise, because the trip takes about an hour.

Of course half an hour after, I was riding with one hand, and even took a video -when you see it, I will like to clarify that I did not fell down, but almost...- and manage to go faster. It was as if a part of me that had atrophied came out again and I confirmed it was still there, just dormant. I must confess that after half an hour the seat started to feel uncomfortable -well maybe not exactly the seat- (Ah! So that is why I don't do this a lot...) but I enjoyed the experience. And now that I tamed that bike, I remembered that sometimes I think how exciting it'll be to drive a 250cc Kawasaki Ninja... Hmmm.

Today's experience made me remember about that wonderful child conflict between the plunge to immerse in learning to ride a bike (if not, how?) and at the same time being careful not to get whacked.

And so is the same in our lives. We need to draw strength from somewhere despite our fears to achieve what we want. We are constantly exposed to fear (of being wrong, to hurt, to suffer, lose, there is at least one for every one) but the important thing is to be aware of this and, if we want to, fight to overcome that fear.

So how about you, how did you learned to ride a bike? If you did, I'm sure you can do anything..!